File Under WTF?!?!?!....Restaurants Sell You Fake Food

Much of what we eat isn't what we think it is. Lax laws on food labeling allow many substitute, "mock" foods to be served instead. Anthony of  DNews looks at what's actually in our food and how it's easy to be fooled. I used to order Calamari quite a bit, too. Makes me wonder WTF I was eating now!

 

File Under WTF?! - Fashion Phuckery in Film - Stripper Dress From 80s Horror Movie - The Hidden

Bad 80s horror films have been my secret (okay not so secret) dirty pleasure for a good while now. A few months ago I came across a forgotten gem called "The Hidden" starring Michael Nouri and Kyle MacLachlan, circa 1987.

The premise of the film is your standard good alien vs. bad alien body snatcher type flick, with bad alien jumping from unlikely body to unlikely body throughout the movie. This movie also contains 80s hallmarks of new wave music, cocaine snorting, and both aliens love fast, expensive sports cars for no explainable reason.

At one point bad alien takes over a stripper and sneaks out of the strip joint that is under police lock down looking for him, wearing his new body. LOL!

Bad alien also selected from the stripper's street clothes, this high impact mullet of a bustier mini-dress to escape in. Looks perfectly acceptable from the front albeit a bit short, right?

You can kind of tell something is just not right with the back that dress by the look on officer #1's face, but even that did not prepare me for the total impact of fashion phuckery that followed.

Built in thong, y'all! Check. Good ole' fashion pancake butt just like Mom used to make! Check. Pancake butt cleavage. Check. Making sure my dress is so short that everyone can see what I had for dinner. Check.



All in all a perfect dress when you look in the closet and say to yourself, "I have nothing to wear!" :-)

You can watch "The Hidden"  in its entirety below. Featuring a very sexy Michael Nouri, a very wooden Kyle MacLachlan (he is supposed to be Good Alien, so I'll cut him a break) and in her first award winning role as Alien/Stripper.....??? Enjoy! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lZblnWgraU&oref=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D7lZblnWgraU&has_verified=1

Instacurity: A Public Service Announcement - Instacurity.com - It's real folks! LOL!

Do you stay up late filtering your pictures? Do your kids stare at their phones during conversations instead of who they're talking to? Did you just stop midway through reading this to look at your phone? The first step is admitting we have a problem.

This is soooo true and it's either laughable or very sad depending on which side you fall on. I don't do that much posting (with the exception of my blog that is syndicated to my social medias), but some days I do wonder how people decide how much is too much with the of posting on Facebook and Twitter. LOL! 

Happy Halloween!! My favorite Zombie YouTube Video...

I don't care how gangsta you are...if a Zombie is coming for you, 
it's leg pumping time! LOL! I think he should have done the Thriller dance!


If you don't already know the Thriller dance, here are the step by step instructions - Just in case you want to break it out at any Halloween parties! :-)

Daft Punk & Will Smith - Get Lucky Wit It (Mashup Video)

Yeah.....I have this on repeat because I love this song 

and I love the mash up even more! Enjoy! :-)

Protective Styling & Up dos: Sock Bun Mania: Easy Tutorial

An easy, stylish on trend protective hairstyle for all year around! I found this great instructional video/infographic combo and wanted to share! Check out Suma From The Fashion Junkie for more of her awesome style!

Sock Bun Mania: Easy Tutorial with Big Sexy, Goody, J&D Beauty

I also recommend :The "wrap it up" which is a soft, bendable hair clip and makes getting your hair into a round bun super easy. It comes in orginal and half up sizes and colors, black, brown and blonde.
You can view a short demo for the half up on the Joyus shopping website here.
The full size version "wrap it up" can be found here. Tutorial video on different ways to use are found here.

File Under WTF?!?! Ultra Reality: What would you do in this situation?

Some people take things waaaay too far and deserve to be fought all in their faces!! OMG! I know you are going to laugh, but watch and enjoy. That one guy who cursed out EVERYBODY after. LLLOOOOOLL!
  I want that TV!. More information about that here: http://lgtv.cl/ultrahd/ Does not appear to be available in the US.

Happy Halloween Weekend!

May Your WereZombieJheri Curl always glisten in the moonlight!

Hair Idol - Chaka Khan

Chaka's hair seemed to have a force of it's own!  One of my favorite Chaka & Rufus songs. :-)

Whip My Hair-Sesame Street Mash Up!

You just knew this was going to happen! How cute is it, though?! Perfect match up!

File Under WTF?!?! - Poodle Exercise With Humans

Lord knows I hate Poodles!! For sure the gates of Hell have swung wide and we are in the last days when phuckery like this is out there for all to see.  On a side note...I will wear my hair like hers today...Bwhahahahah! Check out the poodle in the back in the headband! LOL!

File Under WTF!?!? - Booty Pop Underwear....

This right here definitely gets a long blank stare and a shake of my head.  Never understimate the lengths someone will go to for some booty. LOL! Seriously, they look like they are wearing adult diapers - correction...a LOADED adult diaper!! Fail, fail, fail!!! I am seriously mad at the ONE sister in the sequin dress having the nerve to actually booty pop @ 1:12! Bwahahahaha!!

A New Star From The Smith Family - The Karate Kid Movie

Check out the trailer for The Karate Kid, starring Jaden Smith, Jackie Chan and Taraji P. Henson, a remake of the ’80s classic which hits theaters June 11th.  Preview looks hot with the right amount of comedy (he is Will Smith's kid after all..LOL!)  I loved both the first and second original Karate Kid movies (the rest..not so much).  I bet there will be a surge in kids signing up for Karate lessons just like when the first one came out. I will definitely be taking my little one to see this.  He will enjoy it!

File Under WTF!?!? - The Slap Bet Game Commercial

A dead on parody commercial of the utter craziness of 70s era board games.  Kenner and Hasbro could come up with a board game about almost anything and everything!  Before the internet, video games, cell phones...hell...even cable! We came up with some creative ways to keep entertained! LOL!
This one goes out to Cousin Renee aka Tank and her legendary "Indian Burns" and to Cousin Tony, who could pop his middle finger off his thumb knuckle delivering a sharp crack to the center of your forehead...while you let him....Those were the days!  LOL!

File Under WTF?! - Mail Order Stun Guns?!

Hummmmm...okay.  LOL!  Apparently you can stop fools who are getting in the way of you getting your Black Friday shopping on, quick, fast and in a hurry.  The Cheetah One Million Volt Stun Gun will send ONE MILLION volts of "straighten up and fly right" to their asses and you will be safely home along with the bargain you filched right from under them by they time the regain consciousness. 

On sale right now at Black Friday prices - $49.99 down from $89.99...what a ass shocking bargain!! At that price you can get one for the entire family...including Grandma! You know she want to put it on her church rivals and all those ignorant young G's (and some of the old ones too) in the neighborhood!

Specifications:  World's Strongest Mini Stun Gun: at 1,000,000 volts, this is the highest voltage stun gun available. Just test firing this stun gun into the air is often enough to stop an attacker (Apparently waving this bad boy in the air like Indiana Jones with his whip will scatter them). As the bright electric current pulsates between the test prongs and creates an intimidating electrical sound, an attacker with any sense at all will be stopped in his tracks. 

If the sight and sound doesn't stop them, a jolt from this rechargeable mini stun gun certainly will! When an attacker is touched by the very powerful rechargeable mini stun gun, it will disrupt the message the brain sends to the voluntary muscles. Simply touching an attacker for three to five seconds will deliver a high voltage shock causing loss of balance and muscle control, confusion, and disorientation bringing him to his knees and making him incapable of further aggressive activity. Full recovery takes about five to ten minutes and there is no permanent harm. No batteries needed - simply recharge it.  The ground breaking design of the CHEETAH Stun Gun enables 1,000,000 volts to fire out of a stun gun that is so small it can actually be concealed inside a pack of cigarettes! Traditionally, the higher the voltage of a stun gun the larger the unit had to be. This is because they are normally powered by 9 volt batteries and the higher voltage units required three or four batteries. Now you do not have to choose between a small stun gun that is easy to carry and conceal or a high-voltage unit that is large and bulky.

Even though the CHEETAH is the highest voltage stun gun on the market it is also the smallest on the market. It easily fits in the palm of your hand or can be easily concealed. For those who would prefer to carry it in a holster, a small heavy-duty Leather holster with belt loop is included free.

Note: Stun Guns cannot be shipped to the following states: NY, MA, MI, NJ, RI, WI, IL, HI  Money Back Guaranteed for 30 days!

UPDATE 2013:  Did I not predict this mess?!?!! Did I not?!?!  *SMDH*

The Hotness!! Large 80's Style Ghetto Blaster Weekend Bag

This bag definitely bought a smile to my face when I saw it and is cute and whimsical yet somehow chic and hip.  I'm sure it garners stares and compliments of appreciation from old and new skool alike.  It immediately put my in mind of the movies of that mid 80s time period and the horribly acted yet dance inspiring movies like "Breakin" and "Beat Street."  Now that 80s fashion is making a come back (including the dreaded and dreadful stirrup pant, LOL!)  It would be the perfect finishing touch to your look!  And now for your enjoyment, my favorite 80s dance scene. :-)

File Under WTF?! - Japanese Talk Show....With Lecherous Monkey...

Please file this under WTF?!?! The Japanese can be cutting edge...but sometimes they are on a entirely different level of thought process...LOL!